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Nickers and Snorts
First Posted Mar 12, 2007
Jul 21, 2010

A Horse's View of the World

  1. Arena: Place where humans can take the fun out of forward motion.
  2. Bit: Means by which a rider's every motion is transmitted to the sensitive tissues of the mouth.
  3. Bucking: counter-irritant.
  4. Crossties: Gymnastic apparatus.
  5. Dressage: Process by which some riders can eventually be taught to respect the bit.
  6. Fence: Barrier that protects good grazing.
  7. Grain: Sole virtue of domestication.
  8. Hitching rail: Means by which to test one's strength.
  9. Horse trailer: Mobile cave bear den.
  10. Hotwalker: The lesser of two evils.
  11. Jump: An opportunity for self-expression.
  12. Latch: Type of puzzle.
  13. Longeing: Procedure for keeping a prospective rider at bay.
  14. Owner: Human assigned responsibility for one's feeding.
  15. Rider: Owner overstepping its bounds.
  16. Farrier: Disposable surrogate owner; useful for acting out aggression without compromising food supply.
  17. Trainer: Owner with mob connections.
  18. Veterinarian: Flightless albino vulture.
- verse reprinted from Natural Horse Supply

Nickers and Snorts